Margeaux E.
Photo provided by Margeaux E.
Where do you see yourself in [insert number] years? I used to dread this question. Each time I was asked this I wanted to respond with “I don’t know,” because that was my genuine answer.
As a teenager I experienced a lot of psychological pain. Amidst the pain, somewhere along the way I picked up the notion that I would die young. I convinced myself that I had the emotional age of a person much older than me due to everything I went through and I therefore would not live very far into adulthood. It was difficult to picture myself reaching stereotypical adult milestones.
I now know what I experienced is a common response to trauma called a sense of a foreshortened future. This can be described as feeling as if your life will be cut short or not being able to imagine your future. Hearing the term for the first time was a major “aha” moment because for many years I just thought it was an experience individual to me.
I am currently in my mid-twenties and although my future may still appear a bit fuzzy, I have long-term goals and commitments that excite me and provide a sense of purpose, trusted tools and resources I can lean on, and a close network of people (myself included) who are on ‘team Margeaux’ rooting for me every step of the way.
If you’re reading this and are living with a sense of a foreshortened future, I hope you can take comfort in knowing that
you
are
not
alone
in this experience. Trauma does not have to be a life sentence. Healing happens in the context of safe spaces and community. And most importantly, life does not end at a number.
Margeaux E., Washington State University
IfYou’reReadingThis WSU Chapter Founder
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