Sigma Nu
In May 2022, our Iota Theta chapter lost a member, Mitchell Berry, to a battle with his mental health. We hope to continue honoring Mitchell in our brotherhood, philanthropy, and in living out the values Sigma Nu stands for.
These are accounts of mental health, loss, love, and our chapter. Please see more information about Mitchell Berry at the end of this letter.
If you’re reading this, here are stories from some of our brothers in support of Love, Honor and Truth.
SMU was an unlikely place for me, and before coming to SMU, I’d heard some stereotypes that left me with some anxieties about coming here. But since being here, I’ve made connections and community that’s made me realize our similarities rather than our differences. I think about this when I look back on something that occurred around a year ago.
One of my best friends from back home overdosed and passed away. I received a phone call from one of my friends at a different college at 3:30 A.M., and I didn’t think twice about picking up the phone. He broke the news to me and my life was changed forever. All I could do was break down. I was broken to my core. He had a beautiful soul, and in those hours in the morning, all I could think was “Why is the world so unfair?” or “Why him?”
Thankfully, I had a strong community of friends through the organizations on campus. I looked to friends from freshman year, friends in my Greek fraternity, and even just neighbors from my dorm that previous year. I even went into my suitemates room and broke down while he comforted me. The only thing that helped me during this time was the sense of community we have here. I had never been this vulnerable around anyone in my life up to this point, and I couldn’t have gotten through this without them. I was shocked to find that even people I didn’t talk to much were able to help me, and they did this with no questions asked.
My point in this is to say that you should surround yourself with people you feel comfortable with and that if they don’t help you when you are at your worst, they do not deserve you as a friend. Surround yourself with those you can be vulnerable around. Create connections that will last. Even if they may not seem significant, they can save your life in the future. The organizations on campus may seem superficial, but if you take advantage of them, you will receive the benefits for the rest of your life.
We found a quote in an essay my friend who passed had written. It goes like this:
“I just hope that when the day comes that I’m gone, people don’t remember me by moping around but with magnificent feasts and games.”
So here’s to you, my friend. Many magnificent feasts and games will be had, and I know that you will always be watching and celebrating alongside us.
Kaden V., Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University
When I first attended SMU, I wanted to have a complete reset on the outlook people had on me at home. I came from a life of only knowing what my hometown had to offer me. I wanted to escape that narrow perception and make a reputation for myself different than the one I grew up with.
I wanted something different than to be only known as “my father’s son.” Being a first born son can be challenging and mentally difficult. I’m often required to live up to the expectations of my family and to set an example for my siblings to follow. Sometimes this makes me feel like I only live my life for other people rather than myself. However, I learned how to manage both the expectations that I need to live up to and have a life that I am happy with.
I started by forcing myself to be social with as many people as possible the first few weeks of school. I also joined clubs that were about topics I wanted to learn about or I was interested in. Attending SMU for college also helped me gain independence and self reliance. It was also far enough away from home that I could be independent and make my own goals. A part of this was joining Sigma Nu, which gave me real connection, values to guide my life by, and older role models.
Giovanni F., Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University
I don’t think I ever really understood what people meant when they said that those who fall victim to suicide are the “last person you’d expect,” until my best friend became that person.
Max and I had been best friends since middle school. In every sense of the word, we truly were best friends. It felt like there was some sort of invisible link between us—we thought the same, acted the same, and we could “talk” through just one shared glance.
Max was also one of the most down-to-earth people I’ve ever met; I could talk with him about anything. For our entire senior year, Max and I carpooled to school together. And as the year went on, I began to struggle with anxiety. Nearly every car ride home, I would talk about what I was dealing with, and Max would just listen. Some days, we would even spend an extra twenty minutes sitting in our driveways finishing up our talk. I trusted Max with my life. He understood me like no one else and was always a shoulder to lean on, a console for advice, and an ear to listen.
Max’s passing taught me the importance of having someone like him in my life. Whether your Max is one person or many people, having people who are willing to sit back and listen when you really need to talk is incredibly important. I have also learned how important it is to check in on those around you—and try to really check in on them. Call them, hang out with them, talk with them on the way to class. Talk with them about life, and if they want to open up, just listen and be there for them.
Finally, make the most of the time you spend with others. Tell the people you love that you love them, hug your friends, hug your family, and never take any of it for granted.
Jensen B., Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University
My first year at SMU took a significant toll on my mental health. I was far from home and with so much going on it was hard to make new friends. I had spent the first 18 years of my life with the same friend group and the feeling of being alone without anyone to talk to in person was a lot.
However, finding community in Sigma Nu is the reason I’m still at SMU. Being surrounded by a group of guys who are always there for you is so important. They have been there at my lowest points to pick me back up, and I have been able to be there for my best friends when they needed me most.
Everyone needs to have someone they are comfortable talking to, being at SMU I have seen first hand how difficult it can be for your mental health. Sometimes all someone needs to do is feel like someone is listening.
Alex D., Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University
Although I didn't personally know Mitch, I know he was an amazing mentor and leader. He represented the values of this fraternity: Love, Honor, and Truth.
When first coming to SMU, I didn't feel like I completely fit in or had a place here, but Sigma Nu changed my mind. It offered a true brotherhood; I felt connected with each and every brother and formed genuine relationships with brothers in each grade. Throughout every new step of academics and life, this fraternity has been behind me. Older guys always reach out to check in on me.
I encourage anyone who is struggling with mental health to lean on your friends. Friends are the ones who will be in your corner no matter what; friends want you to be here and are always willing to help. Always reach out. There are always people around who love you.
Drew G., Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University
Mitchell Berry was a finance and statistics student, a proud resident of New Orleans, a son, a brother, and a friend.
“If Mitchell were here today, I’d tell him that his legacy of selfless love for others is living on through all the lives he’s touched while he was here with us. And I’d tell him I love him.”
- Patrick McManus, Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University ‘22
“While I could share numerous stories of how Mitch evoked happiness, laughter, sadness, and even frustration in my experiences with him, he did so in such an unassuming manner that you always felt like the most important person in the room.”
- Chase Moabery, Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University ‘23
“It was hard not to smile around him because he was so positive and uplifting. I’ll never forget his selflessness and support. Mitch, if you’re reading this, I’m so thankful for all the memories.”
- Carter Owings, Sigma Nu and Southern Methodist University ‘25
our dedication
After Mitchell’s passing, Sigma Nu changed their philanthropy to Mental Health America, set up an executive position focused on mental wellbeing, and created philanthropy events dedicated to this mission, such as our annual Σets N’ Nets event supporting Mental Health America on October 13th.
We invite you to read the previous heartfelt letter written by some of his closest friends here and our remembrance here. In dedication to him, we invite everyone to join us at Σets N’ Nets this Sunday or donate directly here.
Connect With Us
To follow IfYoureReadingThis at SMU on Instagram, get in touch with our chapter, and learn about more resources available to SMU students, visit our chapter’s homepage.