Sam E.
If you’re reading this, remember you don’t have to struggle in silence.
If you’re reading this, remember you don’t have to struggle in silence. For most of my life I thought that no one cared what I felt and that I should just ignore my feelings and keep moving. Why would I act any differently? When I was young, I learned from my male role models that men don’t break down and they don’t ask for help. They deal with it and move on, like superheroes in comic books. But that isn’t the reality. Everyone has feelings, and for the longest time, I did my best to ignore mine.
In high school I lost both my grandfathers, and my dad had a stroke, leaving him disabled.
I lost almost every semblance of a father figure in a matter of a year, and just like that, I felt even more alone. So, I did what I was comfortable with: I focused on school and helping my family get through tragedy after tragedy, but my own thoughts and feelings always stayed on the back burner waiting to boil over. Ignoring your own mental and physical health catches up to you, and it’s not always convenient or pretty. I went from a seemingly content and thriving high school senior to a mess of anxiety and depression essentially overnight. Struggling with frequent panic attacks, catastrophic thought spirals, self-hate and suicidal ideations.
And I still tried desperately to hide it, I tried to keep quiet not wanting my parents or friends to worry. But eventually it became too much, I was this close to giving up but instead I opened up to a friend. I hated talking about my problems because I didn’t want to burden those around me, but it saved me. Just talking to one person made me feel less alone in this world and gave me hope that I could get better and learn to manage my thoughts and feelings. And every day I make an effort to get better, but it all started with one conversation. That’s all it takes to begin the path of healing. If you are struggling in silence, take this as a sign, you are worth it, you are loved, and you are never alone; reach out to someone, anyone.
Sam E., Georgia Tech
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