Iris A.

Photography by Mason Schlopy

 If you’re reading this, it’s OK to reach out for help - in any field of life.

My name is Iris and I’m from Greenwich, CT. If you know anything about Connecticut or Greenwich in general, you’d know that it’s known to be a wealthy area. Families are commonly well-off and can put their children into out-of-school activities, such as sports clubs and academic programs. Because of this, the school was competitive. In addition to the town’s excellent education program, the students themselves were talented, which raised the bar even higher.

For a regular student with no astounding talent, navigating my academic worth was difficult. There was always a saying that if you thought you were the best at something, there was always someone doing it better than you. How was I supposed to compete with that?

I started to develop an unhealthy mindset of not asking for help. It started through academics. Seeing my extremely talented and smart classmates made me think I was like them - they didn’t need help, they just knew the material the first time they were taught. I pretended for so many years to be like them, but, in reality, I needed extra help. I benefited from going to after-school math help and one-on-one tutoring sessions with my teacher, but I didn’t want to admit to myself that I wasn’t smart enough. That I needed help.

This unhealthy behavior then seeped into my mental health. Like any other teenager, I had worries and days where I felt down, but I never spoke out. Instead, I was the person people came to to talk about their problems. I would always be there for them, and I knew they would help me out too, but I never asked for their help. I didn’t want to be a burden or have them put my worries above theirs. I didn’t want to be prioritized over, even at times when being prioritized might have helped.

I hit my lowest point in senior year, and not too many people noticed. I had panic attacks in my counselor’s office. I reached the maximum for absences in all of my classes because I didn’t have the courage to get up in the morning. I just didn’t see the point anymore. I needed to ask for help, but I didn’t. I was scared to admit that I needed help.

I knew I needed to seek help, and I was close to it multiple times. When I toured Syracuse, I learned something interesting: Syracuse offers free counseling that’s covered within your tuition. When I came on campus, I signed up for a counseling session, to try it once. Now, I go to counseling once every two weeks, and I can’t stop talking about it. Counseling has changed my outlook on life and the way I navigate friendships and my relationship with myself.

If you’re reading this, know that seeking help doesn’t mean that you’re weak. In fact, admitting that you need help is incredibly strong. Admitting your faults and weaknesses is important to self-growth and improvement. It’s OK to reach out for help - in any field of life.

Iris A., Syracuse University

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