Alissa R.
Photography by Alex Gogo
If you’re reading this, remember that it’s okay to take a step back.
In a world that constantly praises being productive, working hard, and knowing what your next step is going to be, it can be difficult to take a step back without feeling like a failure. Yet, sometimes, taking that break can be so useful for your well-being and self-love. I learned that firsthand during my first year at NYU.
I, just like so many others, started college with high expectations. I was excited to live in a new city, make new friends, and study chemistry. It didn't take long for me to realize that something wasn’t right. I began feeling disconnected from the classes I was in, from the people around me, and even from myself. Studying chemistry was always a path I thought I should be on, but I knew deep down that I wasn't happy. It was as though I didn't belong in my major, and I couldn't get it out of my head that I didn’t fit in with the other students in my class. It was so isolating and made me rethink my abilities and whether NYU was even the right place for me.
Ultimately, I made the hard decision to withdraw in my second semester. At the time, it felt like I had given up. I was scared of what people would think and was worried that it meant I would fall behind. But the time away from pressure and expectations was just what I needed. It allowed me to reflect and breathe.
During the break, I realized what I wanted, not just what I thought I should want. I found that I wasn't passionate about chemistry. It didn’t align with what I wanted to do with my life or who I was becoming. So, I switched my major to psychology, and it felt like things were finally starting to fall into place. I wanted to understand others and myself better. More than anything, I wanted to follow a career where I could help others, especially in improving their mental health. This realization gave me a new sense of motivation and direction.
When I returned to NYU, I also began to get more involved on campus. I found communities that made me feel supported and gave me a sense of belonging. I also felt more connected with my classmates, who shared similar interests in mental health, and I found I wasn't as alone as I thought. Having people around me who cared and being excited about my new major completely changed the way I felt about college. I went from feeling completely lost to having a new sense of meaning.
Now, I am not only back at NYU, but I am thriving. I am pursuing a field I care so deeply about, surrounded by individuals who lift me up, and I feel like I belong. That break, which once felt like a huge setback, turned out to be the greatest turning point for me.
So, if you’re reading this and feeling unsure or like you’re falling behind, just know you are not alone. It’s okay to take a pause. It's okay to question what you want. It's okay if you change your mind. Taking a break does not mean you are a failure; it means you’re listening to yourself. And that kind of self-awareness of what you need? That is strength.
Alissa R., New York University
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