Kyle R.

Photography by Mason Schlopy

If you’re reading this, any challenges in life that you are currently facing are only temporary and you will overcome them because you have worked too hard for it to not work. You are cared for and have a support system, even though at times you do feel alone.

The goal of this letter is to realize that the work, whether it is on your relationships, sport, and/or school work, is not overlooked and you should be proud of how far you have come in life. It is okay to be wrong and enjoy all aspects of life, as you only live once.

A little bit of background on me: I am from Dallas, Texas and currently play lacrosse at Syracuse University, in Upstate New York. Lacrosse is not a very popular sport in Texas, as football is king. When I was around 8 years old, I was introduced to the sport and immediately fell in love with it. Little did I know that it was going to change my life completely, for the better and at times, for the worst.

I took lacrosse very seriously at a young age, some would say a little too seriously. I became obsessed with winning and becoming the best player possible. Lacrosse started becoming my identity, as it was all that I was known for because of how invested I was into the sport. I made the decision in 6th grade that I wanted to play in college. Most people do not start worrying about college until junior/senior year of high school. This shows how serious and dedicated I am to my sport and I was willing to do anything and put everything on the line to make sure that dream came true.

I play goalie. A little fact of the position of goalie is it determines whether your team wins or loses games. One can argue against that but the team with the better goalie normally comes out victorious. So, in 5th grade, I decided that was the position I wanted to play. At a young age I was put into high pressure situations because of these decisions. I have been the reason we have won and lost games, I was even told at the age of 10 I was the reason we lost our championship game by my coach. Tough love, right? I was crushed after that moment and I went home that day and realized that I was willing to put everything on the line to never be told that again.

I worked out twice a day for 4 years straight after that moment. All of my training had to be perfect otherwise the rep would be done 3 more times until it was perfect. These were not healthy behaviors for a 10 year old to be exposed to and it affected me mentally. I started to lose other parts of my life outside of lacrosse. My grades were slipping, my relationship with my friends were strained. I just wanted to play the game I so much loved. 

These behaviors continued until I graduated high school. During summers, I would be traveling for tournaments and showcases in the summer instead of hanging out with friends and family. When I was with my family, all I could think about is how I could have played better in order to help the team win.

Towards my sophomore year of high school, I decided to transfer schools to take my recruiting process to the next level. This was when things really started to get hard. Some of my friends and current HS teammates felt betrayed, as they were shocked when I told them. I made the move anyway and ended up being recruited. I committed and it was the best day of my life. But over the next couple of days after the commitment, I reflected and realized “Was this really worth it?”

After I realized what I could have missed out on in life, I started to work on my relationships with my friends and my family. The realization that this sport was not forever kicked in, as I knew I was going to move on to the final stage of my playing career. I started working on my mental health through guided meditation and building my current and new relationships with my friends.

I want to use my experience to show not to become so fixated on one thing in life. This world has plenty of things to offer and it is okay to have multiple hobbies and not be so one dimensional. Please prioritize your well being and relationships if needed. You can still work hard while enjoying what life has to offer.

Even though I have identified that I need to become more well rounded in life, I still have that obsession of being perfect and struggle to become more well rounded. I do not have many regrets of what I did, as it paid off, but there were definitely things I wished I did differently.

If you’re reading this right now, enjoy life. Take a minute right now and be proud of everything you have accomplished and truly enjoy it.

Kyle R., Syracuse University

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