Corey P.
Photography by Ashley Kung
If you’re reading this, I see you.
I see the little girl who is snickered at when telling adults her dreams of becoming a doctor or a lawyer. I see the girl who sits alone in her advanced classes, where no one acknowledges her although she sticks out like a sore thumb in a sea of peers that look nothing like her. I see the girl who is making great strides in her degree and professional career, but still feels as if she doesn’t belong. I have lived this, and I see you. Although the journey can make you feel invisible, I see you. I have overcome many of these battles. But as we enter new chapters of our lives, which I am currently doing now, we continue to overcome these battles, and I constantly remind myself of these three things:
1. You ARE Where You Are Supposed to Be
It can be challenging to understand the season you are in and why you are there. Sometimes what should feel like one of the highest pinnacles in your life and career can still feel so low. Although you are achieving your wildest dreams, it can still be daunting being the lone face in a crowd, or questioning how you got to where you are. Although you may not understand this cold during the bitter season, the flowers will bloom again.
Much like a college class - the initial lessons may not make sense at first. But performing the assignments and studying the material (AKA doing the self-work to understand you, who you are, and your “why”) will help you understand all the lessons that culminate into the final (self-discovery, because self-discovery NEVER stops happening). What first starts as fragmented pieces of materials, will come together to give you your final answer.
In times of frustration or stress, we can often forget how much we have already learned or achieved along the way. You are here for a reason. You did not get here by luck or by accident. You were put in this place because you were seen. Seen for your abilities. Seen for your potential. You are meant to be here.
2. You DO NOT Have to Prove Yourself
Accelerating in a field where you are considered the minority, many times peers will want you to “prove yourself.” But you do not owe them this. Your efforts and passions will speak for themselves. The charisma, passion, and the unapologetic joy you show in your work will speak for itself. Never overexert yourself or act out of character to be liked or to blend in. You are seen, and earn most of your respect, by being your most authentic self; even if that means standing as an anomaly.
3. Find YOUR Community
Often, we can feel isolated in many of the spaces we must exist in during our day-to-day lives. And often, we are asked to conform to spaces that are not the most welcoming to us. This does not have to be the only community you have. I found that I spent most of my leisure time in graduate school with groups and friends entirely unrelated to my field of work, and around them is when I felt my happiest. Think of the super niche interest or hobby that you have and pursue it.
Find what brings your inner happiness and peace. It is just as (and in my opinion, even more) important to show up to the spaces that make us feel free and seen, as it is in our academic and professional spaces. These are the relationships that will sustain you. These are the people who see who you genuinely are.
So here is the TL;DR - find the spaces that you are loved in and celebrated. Remember to rest. Remember to heal. Remember to always prioritize yourself. You are loved, and you deserve to be in every space you take room in. Even when you feel alone, you are seen. I see you.
Corey P., University of Florida
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