Audrey S.
Photography by Adam Safir
If you’re reading this, you deserve to be heard.
I’ve always been good at speaking up. I can communicate in group projects. I know how to encourage and respectfully disagree. I make sure to tell my friends when they’re killing it in that sparkly blouse.
Yet mental health has always been… different. Somehow, despite the feelings being familiar, they can be impossible to describe. And even if I do form the words, sharing my emotions is even more terrifying. I understand that mental health is as valid as a physical ailment, but the stigma is hard to ignore, especially about something that’s so personal. I am not my struggles, but for better or worse, they’ve shaped my life. It makes potential judgments difficult to face.
And I have faced judgments. Two of the ways my anxiety manifests are skin-picking and tics. In high school, I’d go to class with reddened skin and nail marks. When I’m having a particularly hard day, I’ll blink quickly or wiggle my lips. I’ve watched friends feel awkward or classmates be hesitant to sit with me. I’ve had peers try to “train” my tics out of me only to make me more anxious, and consequently, tic more. I’ve often been called “eccentric.” Yes, my struggles are not entirely invisible, but what I do show feels like droplets in an ocean. The panic attacks, depression, and fatigue from it all go so much deeper. If my ticing can make others uncomfortable, how will they react to my life experiences?
I first started to find my voice through writing. It allowed me to turn my thoughts into something tangible, and hence, make them easier to share. I could throw in my headphones and simply express myself without fear. I could share comfortably and on my own terms.
Next, I took my words to the stage. Recently, I spoke at the annual Michigan Mental Health Fair and was touched by the support my community provided. I deeply appreciated when others approached me, thanking me for my words and sharing their own experiences. IfYoureReadingThis further developed my support network by allowing me to form connections and work towards a shared goal of destigmatization. I am honored to be entrusted with the position of President.
As President, I hope to empower others to use their voice. No one has to suffer silently, and my goal is to create a safe space on campus that allows community members to speak up. I hope that everyone can feel pride in being themselves, no matter how difficult life can be, and understand they have so much to offer this world. Everyone’s story is unique, and I can’t wait to learn more about the exceptional individuals that form our community.
If you’re reading this, you deserve to be heard.
Audrey S., University of Michigan
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To follow IfYoureReadingThis at UMich on Instagram, get in touch with our chapter, and learn about more resources available to University of Michigan students, visit our chapter’s homepage.
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