Heath M.
If you’re reading this, go to the ocean.
I don’t know where you are right now, physically, mentally, emotionally. Maybe you’re somewhere between the past and the future, stuck in that in-between space where nothing feels certain. Maybe you’re questioning if you belong, if you’re on the right path, if things will ever feel easier. I know that feeling well.
For a long time, I never felt like I had a place where I could just be myself, where I could rely on others the way they relied on me. High school was a constant push and pull of trying to fit in, of finding people who made life feel lighter, and just when I finally did, it was time to move on. I spent so much time trying to carve out a space where I felt safe, and the moment it started to feel good, I had to close that chapter and start over again in college.
Starting over is exhausting. Walking into new spaces, meeting new people, figuring out who you are all over again, it’s easy to feel lost in it all. And for a while, I thought I figured it out. I wanted to study finance—whatever that meant—a plan I could follow. It made sense; it was safe; it was what my family had done. Then, a new door cracked open. I hesitated as I was scared to step through, scared of what change might mean, scared of losing the stability I had built. But eventually, I jumped in head first, and it turned out to be the best decision I have ever made. I found myself. I found what truly makes me happy.
But growth is never that simple. Sometimes, finding yourself means growing apart from people you once held closely. It’s painful to realize that as you evolve, some people won’t come with you. I won’t lie and say that part is easy ‘cause it’s not. But, I will tell you that even when it hurts, everything always finds a way of working out. The thing that feels all-consuming in the moment won’t weigh as heavy as time moves on. The silent supporters, they’re rooting for you behind the scenes, smiling for everything you do. So, why waste the energy worrying?
I’ve always been an anxious person: scared to put myself out there, scared to meet new people, scared to try new things. The more I pushed myself, the more I realized fear only has power over me if I let it. Now, I chase the things that make me uncomfortable because I know that’s the only way I’ll grow. I won’t say I’ve mastered it, but what I do know this: every challenge, every moment of doubt, or every time you feel like you’re on the outside looking in is leading you somewhere. You just have to trust it.
If trusting feels too hard, try this instead: go to the ocean. Sit with it. Watch how itmoves, how it shifts and settles, how the waves always find their way back to the shore.
Life works the same way. You’re going to be okay.
Heath M., Syracuse University
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