Nina G.
Photography by Peyton Mears
If you’re reading this, turn defeat into development.
To be completely honest, college was a rough road for me.
I had a difficult senior year of high school. It was 2021, and COVID had taken away most of our activities. My friends and I were in a tough spot, all trying to figure out what came next. I had just gotten out of a bad relationship—my first one—and my mental health had significantly worsened. I thought going away to college meant leaving behind all those feelings and finding complete and utter happiness.
But running away doesn’t solve your problems.
I entered a completely new environment—one vastly different from my bustling, Hispanic-filled city of Miami, FL. It felt like making friends was impossible. I wondered if I was being too picky.
Eventually, I made some friends. I thought I had finally found my college friend group. I consider myself a good person—I pour my heart into people and everything I do. I am understanding, empathetic, and full of care. But despite all of that, by the spring semester of my sophomore year, I found myself alone.
After experiencing a very hard time in my life, I realized I had two options: sink or swim. Every part of me was riddled with anxiety, and all I wanted to do was go to bed and forget everything going on around me. But something inside me clicked— even though I was struggling, life was still moving forward, and I could move with it. I applied for organizations on campus, stepped outside my comfort zone, and started spending time with people I didn’t really know.
I leaned into the discomfort, despite the anxieties that arose within me.
As I write this, I’m listening to the laughter of my sorority sisters as they attempt to do homework, unable to focus through the giggles. I text my two best friends about the New Orleans trip I just took this past weekend to visit my favorite person on earth: one of my best friends from home. I check my email, flooded with acceptance letters from my dream universities for master’s programs. I see all my efforts. I see all my accomplishments.
College isn’t easy for anyone. It’s a period of confusion and never quite feeling good enough. We push ourselves harder and harder until we burn out, or we’re too busy working just to afford our degree. We make friends. We go on dates. People come in and out of our lives, and we have to be careful not to attach our hearts to the wrong ones.
But what happens when you do?
Well, you cry. You feel every inch of it. You journal, go to therapy, or take a walk to clear your mind. You wonder if you’re overreacting. You decide you aren’t—then your friends tell you that you are. You do silly things to cope. And you know why? Because we’re all just trying to figure it out.
Because eventually, you will put yourself out there. Maybe you’ll join the organization you were always interested in—and maybe one day, you’ll even become President. Maybe you’ll join the sorority you never expected to call home. Maybe you’ll do things for yourself, like buying a car or studying abroad.
And, last but not least, you will find your people. Maybe they’ll stay for a long time, or maybe they won’t. But the person you stood by through their hardest times, the one you built up little by little, the one you poured your heart into—that person will always be there.
They might not have a choice. But they will always be grateful for the person who never gave up on them, who showed them love through their darkest times.
And that person is you.
Nina G., Florida State University
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