Lily G.
Photography by Sarah Tyner
If you’re reading this, know that it is okay to be anxious for no reason at all.
I could tell you a list of things that give me anxiety that hundreds of people relate to: tests, being alone, my future, etc. I also could tell you a list of things that give me anxiety that no one might relate to: gas stations and sleeping alone. And, I could even tell you things that give me no anxiety that other people despise: public speaking, essays, and class participation. But you know what gives me the most anxiety out of all things I seem to stress about? Absolutely nothing. And no, sadly I don’t mean that nothing gives me anxiety. I mean that half the time I have a breakdown, can’t focus because I’m too stressed, or pull my eyelashes out in panic (yes, that just happens to be my anxious tick), it’s from no particular source – no one reason I can pinpoint.
Those who don’t struggle with anxiety don’t understand this. They seem to think it’s the best/easiest kind. “Well, if you can’t think of a reason why you are stressed, that’s easy, just don’t stress” they will say. And as they say “iykyk,” and let me just tell you, if you KNOW you KNOW. It’s not the easiest stress to get over – it’s the hardest. It’s not the mildest panic attack to overcome – it’s the strongest.
What I am here to say is that you are not alone. Probably 80% of my panic attacks or crappy days stem from a reason that I can’t pinpoint for the life of me. Two weeks ago, I had a super easy week. No tests, quizzes, or projects due, I received a good grade on a previous test, and was getting ready to go spend the weekend at the beach with my best friends, celebrate my boyfriend’s birthday, and win sweetheart of a fraternity. I should be excited, relaxed, living the life, right? Nope. Every single night that week I nervously chewed away at my inner cheeks in my sleep. They got scarred, swollen, and it even got to the point where it hurt to eat solid foods. But I couldn’t calm my anxiety because I didn’t even know what the hell I was anxious about.
I still don’t know why I was so anxious that week. But what I do know is that there is light at the end of the tunnel. It does end, and you will be able to relax again soon. In the meantime, make sure to rely on your friends, surround yourself with people who make you happy, and do things you enjoy that take your mind off the stress even if it’s only for a few minutes. What you shouldn’t do is exactly what you might feel like doing: curl up in a ball in your bed, seclude yourself from everyone and everything, and dwell on it. I can promise you that is only going to make it worse. There are people who care about you, people who want to be there for you, people who will talk it out with you, and people who will take your mind off of it. You need to use those people in these times. Admitting you need them isn’t a sign of weakness, it doesn’t make you weird, and it definitely doesn’t make you annoying. In fact, it makes you strong and confident, and it makes you feel better, so who cares what else it makes you? And I promise you, those people who care about you are more than happy to be there for you if you let them. Don’t get me wrong though, it’s okay to want an hour alone to cry in your bed or take a nap at 2pm because you are exhausted from the stress – I’ve personally done both. But, at the end of the day, as hard as it is, the best thing to do for your stress is to surround yourself with people who care about you, do things that make you happy, and just distract.
If you’re reading this, know that it is okay to be anxious for no reason at all. Nothing is still something, and your feelings are real and valid. But also know that there are plenty of other people feeling this exact same way. People who are older than you, people who you think of as perfect, people who seem to have it all together, and more. I know it’s not easy, and don’t let people make you feel like it is. Don’t be ashamed that you are having a panic attack over “nothing” because, sometimes, “nothing” is the fucking worst. BUT it WILL get better and it WON’T last forever.
Lily G., Georgia Tech
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